Gradituesday

I had just turned 16 and was in my Junior year of high school. My brother is 6 1/2 years older than me and when he turned 16 he started to work after school. He really enjoyed having a little money in his pocket and soon let that outweigh his desire to do well in school and ended up messing up his schooling. Because of this my mom said that I would not be allowed to work during high school.

I took two years of accounting. It was my second year and I was sitting in class. A lady came to the door and my teacher went out in the hall. A few minutes later she asked me to come out into the hall. The other lady was the head of the FBLA class where kids get out half day to work. She had a pediatric dentist wanting a student and all her kids were placed in jobs. She went to the accounting class and asked the teacher who she had that would work well in a pediatric dental office. She chose me. I went home and my mom agreed for me to go on the interview. I am sure that she thought, or hoped, that I would not get the job and it would not have been her fault. I was hired on the spot.

I was not officially in the program the first year. I had PE and the rearranged my schedule to put it last class and gave me a study hall for my next to last class. They gave me a pass to leave at lunch and just gave me grades for the PE and study hall and I did not have to attend. I was to answer phones, pull and file patient charts, schedule appointments, and help file insurance. I would get there during their lunch time and get all the filing done. As I answered phones and did my other work I would constantly have a patient on my lap because I loved kids and they were drawn to me. I lasted about 2 weeks up front before they saw that I worked well with the kids and called me to the back to sit with the kids. I began learning how to assist the doctor and by the end of the first month I was assisting him full time.

I went on to work full time in the summer then was officially in the program to get out at lunch my senior year. Two months after I graduated high school I came home from work. My mom way lying in the kitchen floor. I stooped down and started feeling for a pulse and was ready to begin CPR and she mumbled, "I am okay." She could not breath, she was gasping hard to get a breath in. The paramedics came and would not let me ride with them to the hospital. I followed and sat in the waiting room in the ER. They came out one time and told me to contact family so I wouldn't be alone. I called my brother and my mom's step sisters. It was over an hour before anyone showed up. They finally took us to a room and told us that she had died on the way and thay they tried for an hour to revive her but could not. They could not tell me because I was 17. She had blood clots that were in her lungs.

A week later we had our yearly CPR training scheduled. I was with the last patient so I cleaned my station while everyone went to the waiting room where we did our training. I walked into the waiting room and the first thing I saw was Annie, the dummy you do CPR on, lying on the ground. My breath caught in my throat and I began to fight breaking down. Then, I looked up to the paramedic that gave the class. It was the same man that came to my house and worked on my mom. I could not stop the tears then. They all told me I did not have to do the class but I knew better than ever that I needed to be prepared. I was not the prettiest rescuer there with big swollen eyes streaming tears and problems with my nose.

It was God's provision for me to have that job. He knew I would need it to survive. My mom had only made $14,000 a year as a secretary. She had a $14,000 life insurance policy that my brother and I split, so I would need to provide for myself. It was so awesome to see just how much God had planned my steps and know that He loved me enough to take care of me. It was my first time to see His hand in my life.

Now, I am not thankful that I lost my mom, but am thankful that I gained knowledge of a Father. I grew up in church. My mom was a wonderful Godly example. I walked the line all my teenage years wanting both to walk with God and to do my own thing. I spent a year after her death seeking my own happiness. I finally realized that God is the source of true happiness. He became real to me- not just my mom's God but MY God. I think that He had to take my mom so that I would fully depend on Him.

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